Judge John Hodgman on Using Bath Towels to Clean the Litter Box

James writes: I clean our cats’ litter boxes on laundry day, so that I can use the dirty towels to dry the (clean) boxes out before refilling them. My wife thinks it’s gross, but the towels go straight into the wash afterward. She would prefer that we get cheap towels for this dedicated purpose. I think that’s a waste.

Probably you’re right. Probably those towels are clean. But they are dripping with Toxoplasma gondii as far as I am concerned. You must permit this illogic, because bath towels are intimate. They surround our naked, wet bodies at their most vulnerable, and your wife deserves to reach for a towel and not think, Is this a shawl of cat poop? Perhaps soon you will have some houseguests. Try telling them your scheme as you hand them a towel. Or better, have your towels monogrammed: “These were inside a litter box, but I swear they are clean.” I bet not even the cats would touch them.